Mornings are hectic. Having to get kids up and ready for school makes it even more so.

But they become a whole lot easier once your child learns how to adopt a positive morning habit…and do it on autopilot.
Use this chart to reinforce four simple behaviors with your child. The routine can be done before or after breakfast, whichever comes more naturally for your family. Reward your child with a sticker each day he completes his routine successfully. After five or ten consecutive days of success, celebrate with high-fives and a special treat.

Click here to download the ONE WEEK chart

Click here to download the ONE MONTH chart

Winging it as a parent

For the past five years I have been like 99.9% of parents on the planet: pretty much winging it. While I have read my fair share of books on parenting, I never took an in-depth parenting course. I gleaned what knowledge I could from teachers, other moms, and from occasionally catching tips from a parenting expert on TV or in a magazine.

I knew that my general goal was to raise happy, well-adjusted boys who loved to learn. I have a plan when it comes to enriching their lives with activities and helping them achieve major milestones. But I had never really mapped out a plan for becoming the kind of parent I needed to be in order to raise children who fit that bill.

Honestly, I never really saw the need. Yes, I was flying blind through this incredibly important job. But, I figured I had a great role model in my mom, and felt as long as I stayed close enough to her approach, my kids would turn out okay.

Sure there were many days when I couldn’t remember what my mom would do in a certain situation, or felt frustrated with my own short fuse, or guilty that I could have handled a scenario better. But there was no crisis, if you will. My boys are very active, but generally well behaved, loving, and decently well-adjusted.

A Webinar That Should Be on the “Required Reading” list for Parents

And then a few weeks ago my good friend Aviva introduced me to Amy McCready. She is a Today Show parenting expert and the founder of Positive Parenting Solutions.

Aviva invited me to sit in on a free webinar Amy was giving that afternoon on getting kids to listen without shouting or nagging. I was a little skeptical at first. Would she share useful information, or would it just be a big advertisement for a more expensive program (I’ve been on those kinds of webinars before and avoid them like the plague)?

My friend assured me it would be worth attending.

It was probably the best hour I’ve spent in a good while on anything.

I sat riveted in my seat alternating between the stomach-dropping realization that “ohmyGOSHIamCOMPLETELYyscrewingupmykids” to the uplifting “oh I see what I could be doing differently and I could totally do that.”

While it was sobering to realize that I had been pretty darn random when it came to discipline, especially how confusing that randomness must have been for my boys (particularly for my oldest), I also felt like I got some insights that would enable me to adopt a more proactive, positive approach going forward.

In fact, I took notes like a crazy person and that evening got my husband to commit to making the same changes I was going to. In just a few weeks, we’ve noticed a significant drop in yelling chez nous. Even better, spontaneous hugs and kisses from our oldest, Will, are on the rise.

I was so impressed with Amy and her content that I had to figure out a way to share it with our readers at Buttoned Up. We connected and I am thrilled to announce that she has agreed to partner with us to bring her webinar content to you.

So on Wednesday October 19th, you will have a chance to attend the same life-changing webinar that I did.

Topic: Get Kids to Listen without Nagging, Reminding or Yelling!

Date: Wednesday, October 19th at 9pm Eastern Standard Time

Access: All you need is a computer with a speaker to hear the presentation. When you RSVP Amy will send you the log-in instructions.

RSVP: Webinar seating is limited due to technology so, you need to reserve your seat — and I’d do it early as I have a feeling it will fill up quickly. Click here to register and participate. Trust me, you won’t want to miss this.

How It Works: Once you register, you will receive an email confirmation with the link to access the webinar. When you “enter” the webinar, you’ll see the session slides on your screen as well as a video box to see the presenter – but Amy won’t be able to see you! You can use the chat box to type questions or make comments. She runs these webinars in a very interactive fashion, so if you have a specific question, she is very likely to see it in the chat and answer it directly.

Bottom line: if you want to be a better parent, taking the one hour to attend this webinar is an absolute must.

Disclosure: I am such a believer in Amy’s program that we have decided to enter into an affiliate relationship with her – our first ever. If you end up purchasing her program (which I did and have been bowled over by) we will receive a commission. We would certainly not even consider doing this if we weren’t 100% convinced of the incredible value of this program.

From DVD programs that supposedly expand your brain to speed reading programs, there are a plethora of products on the market that cater to parents looking to give their children a leg up in life. But before you rush out to buy a brain-enhancing product, consider another (free) alternative: instilling a good habit or routine.

There are many reasons why a good habit is a better bet than that fancy flash-card system.

For starters, there are neural connections to consider. The young human brain develops literally trillions of connections, called synapses during the first ten or so years of life. Ones that aren’t used repeatedly get pared away during the later teenage years. So, the earlier you institute a good habit, the more strongly the neural connections are wired, and the more likely the habit is to stick over a lifetime. Secondly, their pre-frontal lobes (responsible for insight, planning, and other big-picture executive functions) do not fully develop until somewhere between the ages of 18 to 25. As a parent then, part of your job is to serve as their external pre-frontal lobe. That means you must look ahead for them and identify which kind of regular behaviors will serve them best in the long run, start them on the path to adopting that behavior, and then bolster their (weak) wills when they falter. Finally, last, but not least, chances are that your own involvement in their adoption of the new habit will strengthen your relationship with them and maybe even build your own good habit muscle a little too.

So if the above has you wanting to adopt some new routines, but you aren’t sure how to get your child to adopt them, here are three ways you can help her develop a positive habit.

1. Plan the Week. Sure, spontaneity is the spice of life, but overall it is better to have a sense of the week ahead. Sit down Sunday night with your children and help them plan the week ahead. Discuss the micro and the macro – so how to plan for the science project that’s due in three weeks as well as how to take into account extracurricular activities and coordinate schedules with everyone else in the family. Resist the urge to give the answer. Instead, engage your children in the planning – ask questions that engage and strengthen their planning muscle. It will help develop critical skills that can be used throughout their lives.

2. Make a Morning Routine. Mornings can be so hard, especially for teenagers. Start your kids on a path to productivity by enforcing a morning routine as soon as possible. The critical components are: getting dressed, making the bed, brushing teeth, and organizing what they need for the day. If mornings are a particularly brutal time, institute an evening routine where everyone in the family (including mom and dad) get their backpacks, keys, wallets, and purses organized and ready by the door before hitting the hay.

If your children are really little, you might benefit from printing out a visual chart or some cards the illustrate the routine you would like them to adopt. These two sites have some neat (free!) printable habit cards.

Bright and cheery options from Childhood101

sophisticated and simple cards from Living Locurto

3. Good Things Do Happen to Those Who Wait. Nothing prepares your kids better than teaching the lesson of delayed gratification. A study showed that a child’s ability to hold off on eating a cookie at age 4 correlated with their overall success later in life. Impulse purchases are part of our culture – and a little treat now and then isn’t a bad thing to do – as long as also reinforce delayed gratification as much or more. Waiting for something you think you really want separates the nice-to-haves from the musts – and almost always makes whatever it is you’re waiting for that much sweeter in the end.

The bottom line is simply this: starting good habits, whether it’s making the bed, cleaning up toys, or organizing themselves for their bags for baseball practice, sets kids up to become more productive, and yes, organized, adults.

Did your parents give you routines to follow as children? If so, did you find it helpful? Do you currently have routines for your kids? If so, how well do they follow them?

The summer is almost upon you! If you haven’t already sat down with your family to discuss what you will do – vacation, outings, camps or classes for the kids – do so NOW!

Getting your kids to eat their veggies can be quite a challenge!

But serving the greens on a cute plate could help your little one get more excited about them. I’m in love with the new Zoo Tableware set from Skip Hop. Choose from four different prints—owl, bee, monkey and dog.

Which one do you like best? The owl is my favorite.

Get road-tested tips from real women that show you how to say no gracefully and take back control of your schedule once and for all.

Alicia and Sarah interviewed hundreds of women nationwide for their book Pretty Neat. In this video they interview one of them: Nina Restieri, founder of momAgenda and mother of four beautiful children.

As you can imagine, with four children in four different schools, Nina is frequently asked to help volunteer at various functions. After saying yes one too many times, she developed an effective strategy for saying no without guilt or negativity.

See how she does it. Pick up your copy of Pretty Neat today.

Delegation Boot Camp: Get Organized to Get Your Kids to Help Out More

Have you ever thought about how many times a day you ask your kids to do something? Whether you’re asking your kids to pick up their toys, their dirty laundry off their bedroom floors, or their school book bag pile that just seems to flop in front of the door, you’re probably sounding a bit like a broken record. The worst part? All of that nagging never really seems to work anyway. The wet towels are still on the floor, you’ve tripped over Buzz Lightyear an infinite number of times, and the dog definitely never got walked. It’s enough to make the strongest mother feel defeated. How do you get the kids to pitch in without pitching a total fit?

Sarah on “trying not to cosset”

“I’ll admit that I am my own worst enemy. I found myself thinking that my toddler was too young and I definitely babied him too much. Once he got to preschool, the teachers expected him to hang up his coat, put away the toys, and keep his area neat – all things I definitely wasn’t reinforcing at home. I was slightly embarrassed, since he actually had to unlearn the bad habits that I was essentially teaching him without even realizing it. I learned a huge lesson that others will expect much of your kids, so you should too. My younger son is already learning that it’s not a free ride at home.”

Alicia on “a family that works together”

“I am big believer that everyone in the family needs to contribute. It’s not just the job of the mom and dad to carry everything, so my daughter has always had chores and there’s no payment for it. She knows that to be part of the family, she needs to contribute her part as well. Every Sunday, we all sit down and plot out the week, what needs to get done, and who is doing what. She knows what is on her list for the week and she gets it done without any trouble. We started young, so it’s just part of the routine now.”
Three more things to think about when co-opting the kids into helping around the house:

1. Teaching an Important Lesson.

Nobody likes to nag, but it is even worse to be the one that constantly hears “you never help” or “you don’t do anything.” Remember that delegating chores or tasks not only means you’ll be nagging less, but it also teaches your kids an important lesson in how to be a team player.

2. Slow and Steady Wins the Race.

Don’t go from zero to 100. If your kids don’t help out at all right now, don’t hit them with a 20-task list. Instead, start small and let them feel the accomplishment in a few tasks. After a few months, gradually increase the tasks.

3. Be specific to avoid frustration.

There’s nothing worse than telling a kid to make their bed and then finding a blanket thrown over the lumpy sheets. The parent feels frustrated that it’s not done correctly, and the child feels like they’re always getting scolded. When devising the tasks, be specific about when it needs to be done and how. Garbage day is Monday morning? Make sure they sort Sunday night and tell them how you want it done. More instruction now means less frustration later. Oh, and don’t forget to praise and thank them. A pat on the back goes a long way.

Requiring Kids to Help Out Builds Responsibility

By Alyssa Davis of Metal-Wall-Art.com

In days gone by, down on the farm, there was never a question as to whether children would help out with the household chores, because it was simply a matter of necessity. Along the way, by acting as members of a family, invariably the kids learned to be accountable and responsible. If a chore did not get done, the whole family suffered, so children learned early, that doing their chores was a lot like breathing, and they did them automatically so the family could survive and thrive.

As generations have passed, no longer is a child’s attending to chores going to directly affect the good of the family. As a matter of fact, it is often much easier for parents to quickly and expertly perform the chore themselves, because it takes a fraction of the time and effort that it takes to teach a child to do it and follow up to make sure that it gets done. Many households are affluent enough to hire household help, like a gardener and a maid to attend to the chores, so even the parents do not have to tend to any chores.

Side Effects of Helping Out

Unfortunately, what has been lost over the years is the serendipitous side effect that so benefited a growing child, namely learning to be responsible. If for no other reason, learning to be responsible and accountable for their actions is a single, strong enough reason for any child to have household chores. Now the accidental side effect is that it might even make life a little easier for Mom and Dad. Along with responsibility, household chores teach children how to take care of themselves. For example, every person, male and female, should know how to cook a meal, set a table, make a bed, do laundry, vacuum a floor, dust tabletops and take out the trash.

In today’s world, a wife is just as likely to work outside the home as the husband is, and more often than not, the couple is sharing household chores in whatever way makes the most sense for their schedule. So having children perform a variety of chores around the house is tantamount to growing a well rounded child into a self sufficient adult.

A Well Rounded Child

With this goal in mind, it is never too early to start children off with their own chores. Even very young children can put toys away, help bring in the groceries, help clear the table or feed the dog. Giving any child the responsibility of completing a task builds their self confidence. Make sure to tailor the task to the child’s abilities, and always allow ample time for a child to complete a chore. Of course children will drag their feet and complain about doing chores from time to time, but if there is ample time for a parent to insist patiently rather than threaten loudly, the outcome is usually much better for everyone.

As a child grows, they can be given chores that require more and more skill and carry with them greater responsibility, and in time parents will notice that they have raised self assured and quite capable young adults.

Jessica Ackerman from WallDecorandHomeAccents.com generously shares everything she knows about wine grapes wall art and Celtic wall crosses.

As a mom of an eight year old, Lucy, I am always looking for easy ways to get her to help out more in cleaning up and getting organized. I try to make helping out a game but at times I just run out of creativity and ideas….then I came across this great card game, Les Mess.
The Less Mess Cards are an easy way to get kids to help out and create ‘less mess’, Each card has a simple activity and a time associated with it. For example, one card says:
30 to 60 minutes
Organize your toys, then you may play with them if your parents say it’s ok

Have a look at them and think about getting them for you and your kids.

Giveaway!

Check out the giveaway of one set of cards HERE!