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Buttoned Up > Everyday Life > Home > What do chores have to do with sex?

What do chores have to do with sex?

posted by Sarah on November 15, 2013 | print article | e-mail to a friend
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  • Phoebe135

    I dont do it with chores but my boyfriend always stays up longer than me in the evening watching some stupid war documentary. He often falls asleep in the couch with the tv still playing and the lights on. so sometimes I persuade him to go to bed early. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesnt. but it keeps me from getting a lack of sleep because I have to get up in the middle of the night to shut off the tv and lights.

  • Shawna

    This exact topic caused an argument between my husband and I recently. He heard this being discussed on talk radio and jokingly told me that he was going to do fewer ‘feminine’ chores around the house so I’d be more interested in the bedroom… considering he does less than half of the households tasks already, I didn’t think it was too funny. Needless to say, that night I went to bed exhausted again and ticked, and he went to bed sex-less again. I’ve tried explaining to him many times that my mile-long list of things to do on top of working a full time job like he does causes stress and both factors play a part in my low libido and it’s like it goes in one ear and out the other as he continues to wonder why I’m not as interested in sex as he is. He thinks that this problem is exclusive to our marriage and that no one else has this problem.

  • SarahButtonedUp

    Finding compatible sleep rhythms is tricky. My husband is a night owl too – and I am an early morning person. Our solution: we ended up getting headphones for him and an eye mask for me. That way he can watch TV in bed (with the lights off) while I sleep. Everybody is happy.

  • SarahButtonedUp

    Shawna – you are most definitely not alone. When I read that research finding my mind immediately started to ponder how we could do an experiment that would quantify the effects of exactly what you and I are talking about.

  • Jenn

    I wonder if it works in reverse. If they get more action, will they be inclined to do more chores and be more helpful. Hmmm…

  • SarahButtonedUp

    Hmmmm is right. Worth experimenting! 🙂

  • theydopaymetothink

    YOU have the right idea. If you move first toward being helpful to him, it’s amazing how much more likely he will try to help you. But, though we are simple, many of us are not stupid, and we will not fall for simple manipulation — at least not for long.

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